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As I reflect on my younger years, I now realize that a lot of my troubles were rooted in the fact that I did not fully believe in myself, or love myself enough. Too often, I allowed people’s opinions and actions to dictate my mood and my sense of self. I look back and think…“you had everything you needed and just did not realize it.” We often look outside ourselves for validation – from family, from friends, or from a spouse or partner. In time, it becomes apparent that true happiness can only come from first loving ourselves and accepting the person we are. As cliche as it sounds; ‘the greatest love of all is indeed learning to love yourself.’
This doesn’t mean that you shut everyone out of your life and only think of yourself. Neither does it mean that you become egotistical and selfish. But, foremost – you do have to find happiness from within, before you can maintain it in all other areas of your life. I remember growing up and watching old movies where the story always centered around the lead finding their perfect love and living happily ever after. The premise was always…..finding that person will complete your life. There’s even a famous movie from the 1990s with the quote ..“you complete me.” In my humble opinion, you have to learn to love yourself completely first. Having said the above, I am not negating the transformative power of true love. Nevertheless; you cannot expect another person to change your entire life, erase all your troubles, and then you become magically happy forever. Firstly; find love and acceptance in your heart – for you. Love the person in the mirror. Never compromise your principles for anyone. If you base your entire existence on validation from other human beings you will always end up becoming disappointed….at some point. Regardless of who that person is.
In today’s society where social media plays such a significant role in many people’s lives, it’s crucial to have a high sense of self-worth. Your existence cannot be centered around what people think of you. Or around celebrity culture which is most times not what it seems anyway. People project what they want you to see and what they want you to believe. It’s a whole lot of smoke and mirrors. I think the popularity of reality TV in the last decade or so, has left a lot of young people (especially) thinking….. everyone has to be a star or wealthy, in order to be happy. At times it seems like we have become a society of idolatry. Always remember, your life is just as valuable as anyone else’s. It is not an accident you are here on this earth. We all have something to contribute. When you truly learn to love yourself (completely), no-one will ever again be able to make you feel you are not good enough. You will find your answers, you will find your happiness. You will always have peace – within. Happiness begins with you.
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